I am a practical sort of person. One who realizes life occasionally tosses out curve balls. In other words, having now reached the giddy heights of middle age, I am not easy to surprise.
- Mankind’s inhumanity to man? I am inured.
- The destruction of civilization as we know it? Meh.
- The current fashion trend of pairing bike shorts with blazers? 😂
That said, there were a couple of things I was not entirely prepared for when we started cycling.
One of those was the importance of an anatomical area not thought of since childbirth. The ischial tuberosity. Otherwise known as -
Sit bones.
My reintroduction to these small but integral little bony protrusions came about after a complaint on my part.
(Okay, okay, so it might have been a round of complaints.)
My grievance centered on the grave discomfort of my, errr…nether regions, after a ride.
Steve, ever the trusty researcher, hopped on the computer to track down the source of my ire. Turns out those of the female persuasion tend to a slightly wider measurements between sit bones than men. A saddle commiserate with the distance between one’s sit bones is imperative to comfort.
(My saddle was too narrow. 😜)
Problem solved. Huzzah!
This led - as so many things do - to a conversation.
Steve: You need a new saddle.
Me: Okey dokey.
Steve: We need to get you measured.
Me: I…what?
Steve: We need to get you measured.
*silence*
Me: What, exactly, are you proposing I have measured?
Steve: The distance between your sit bones.
Me: *raises eyebrow*
Me: And how, exactly, is that supposed to happen?
Steve: They can do it at a bike store.
*more silence while I mentally picture various scenarios involving strangers and a tape measure*
Me: Ummm…Nope. 😳
I felt pretty good about my decision. I mean, the area in question would adjust with a little time. Like muscles do after a workout.
Right?
My complacency lasted a few more outing. At with point I was willing to PAY to have some stranger measure my sit bones.
Gah!
I had to have them measured twice.
Do not even ask….
* * *
MAMIL
Or.
Middle-Age Men in Lycra
This gets a bad rap. Undeserved, in my humble opinion.
Lycra is not a bad thing. If the body wearing it is nicely maintained, it can be, most definitely, not a bad thing. Middle-aged or not.
However….
Lycra harbors one little known but quite serious hazard. At least little known to non-cyclists.
This would involve the cycling bib.
For those not in the know, these babies are worn in lieu of cycling shorts. They have straps over the shoulders, rather like a pair of suspenders. This has the benefit of doing away with a waist band. Much more comfortable.
The danger here is that the lycra quality in bibs varies. Inexpensive bibs stretch thin under…duress.
Sometimes very thin.
Transparent, even.
So. Is everyone here aware that cycling is done…commando?
Yes. You read that correctly.
Com-man-do.
If you cycle, there is a distinct possibility that at some point in time you will find yourself riding behind a fellow enthusiast, who, for some incomprehensible reason has chosen to purchase cheap bibs.
- Someone not slim.
- Someone hairy.
- Someone whose posterior you have no desire in this or any other lifetime to peruse all up close and personal like.
Are you feeling me here?
ARE YOU?!?!
For the love of all that is holy.
DO NOT BUY CHEAP BIBS
The eyes on seven continents thank you.
Donations:
Donations:
No comments:
Post a Comment